I smoked my first pipe of hash on my friend’s balcony when I was 18. I’ve always been curious and had a need to explore what life has to offer. I didn’t know at the time that this was the introduction to a relationship that would last until my thirties.

Every year I choose to put myself in the fire by doing something difficult. The last two years doing a dieta in the jungle has challenged me to my core and beyond.

It was a powerful letting go, even more so because I was partaking in a shamanic initiation course.

I had no idea how dysregulated I was from everyday life, until landing in Peru and settling down at the retreat centre Kesten Rono.

Over the winter, I’d been spending way too much time watching movies, playing games, eating sugar, and drinking coffee, and I was in a complete doing mode and nervous system activation.

Half a year ago I was preparing myself for Peru. I was on my way to study with Shipibo Maestro Don Enrique in the jungle outside Iquitos. My heart was calling me on, and it was happening so fast. It’s been a desire for at least a decade to be held by the sounds and the plants of the jungle. There is nothing like health issues to create momentum, and when I learned about a family member getting cancer the day before a Ceremony in November it changed the course of my life.

What is a masculine frame?

A frame enables you to hold your centre; to know your worth, boundaries and values. When you peruse your interests, hobbies, dreams and life’s work you are creating your frame. Everything else must exist within this frame. You are making yourself the priority.

Holding Your Woman Through the Feminine Emotions



This is a raw subject, and a practice that may take a long time to master. On a personal level I still have much to learn and the growth never stops. Women are powerful, strong, gorgeous and capable of moving the full spectrum of archetypes through their being.

Sacred Fire with Master Oak

One of the traditional reasons for doing a dieta in the Amazon is to get closer to the Spirit of a plant, to build connection and to become allies in Sacred work. During the dieta, I finished my Sacred Pipe and received a teaching on how to use Sacred Mapacho, black jungle tobacco, in Ceremonial context. I could feel the essence of Oak as I was using the pipe and the strength of my new teacher.

Finding your edge is a beautiful thing. The edge is the space between an old habit and a new habit.

The edge is the point of choice between being a slave to your old belief or becoming a master of your own life. The edge is the pain-pleasure point you are so familiar with. The edge is when you push yourself over your comfort zone just a little bit. The edge is the growing pain of staying small versus your potential. The edge is a powerful source of energy where all master pieces are created.

Do you remember the last time you were at a point of choice, with the option of ejaculating or saving your powerful seed and use the energy to create in the world?

This is where I’m writing from right now. The point of choice. I’ve gone 25 days with semen retention, and the craving can sometimes feel so strong, almost overpowering. At times I want to give in. I want to reach for addictions and numb this energy with habits that keeps me small.

To get back into your masculine power it is very important that you can brake the chains of the porn-program. This is a program that is keeping men small. It is so easy now and its getting our young men and boys at a very early age. Porn is free, there is no emotional, physical or spiritual investment needed for you to experience what ever sexual fantasies you might have or you might be led into traumatic experiences with porn that you really wish you were left without.

This is too easy, and it’s not your fault.